Bullying incident from APIS campus.

APIS的校园霸凌事件

This is an incident involving bullying towards my child at school. Initially, it was just minor incidents, but we reported it to the school as soon as we heard our child's account. However, the school deemed it to be just harmless teasing and not bullying. As time went on, the situation escalated to the point where physical harm was caused. The entire ordeal lasted for about 5 months. Despite this, the school still did not acknowledge it as bullying, and only called it "targeted isolation" and did not take any measures to address the issue, allowing it to continue to develop. I will continue to update the entire communication process with the school and fight for principles of openness, transparency, and fair treatment.
这是一起涉及我孩子在学校遭受的霸凌事件。事件最初只是一些小事,但我们在第一时间听到孩子的讲述后向学校进行了反馈。然而,学校认为这只是正常的玩闹,不属于霸凌行为。随着时间的推移,事态不断升级,直到导致了身体伤害。整个过程持续了约5个月。即便如此,学校仍未认定此事为霸凌行为,而只是称之为“针对性孤立”,且对此事未采取任何处理措施,任其继续发展。我将会持续更新与学校沟通处理的整个过程,并争取公开透明、公平处理的原则。
ExplanationAPIS is the abbreviation of a school located in Chiang Mai, and its full name is American Pacific International School.
注释APIS是清迈美国太平洋国际学校的简称

Note: The purpose of creating this page is to urge the school to take bullying incidents seriously and make them transparent to the public, so that more people can participate in monitoring the progress of the issue.

说明:建立此页面的目的,是希望学校重视霸凌事件,将事件公开化透明化,让更多的人参与监督事情的进展

Situation

概述

My child is an APIS boarding student who lives in a triple room dormitory. Since late November 2022, two other girls have been isolating my child, and this situation has continued for some time. During this period, there were several incidents of physical contact, but they were ignored. I have reported this to the school several times, but the school has brushed it off as normal. This isolation mostly occurs before bedtime at night, with a few incidents happening during break time and after-school activities. Recently, in March 2023, my child suffered a serious physical injury. She was pushed down to the ground, and her right shoulder was scraped behind with bleeding and an area of about 4-5 square centimeters. She was treated in the school health room for a week, but she is still feeling pain. The school did not inform the parents of the injury promptly, and we only began communicating with the school at this time.

我的孩子是一名APIS住校生,她住在一个三人间寝室里。自从2022年11月下旬开始,另外两名女生开始孤立我的孩子,这种情况持续了一段时间。期间发生了多次身体接触事件,但都被忽视了。我多次向学校反映此事,但学校以正常情况为由予以搪塞。这种孤立事件在大部分情况下发生在晚上睡觉之前,有少数发生在课间和课余活动时间。最近,在2023年3月,我的孩子遭受了一次较严重的身体伤害,她被推倒在地,右侧肩膀后面撞伤,这块伤口有出血,伤口面积约4-5平方厘米。她在学校医务室治疗了一个星期,但仍然感到疼痛。学校发生伤害后未及时通知家长,直到这个时候我们才正式开始与学校进行沟通。

Identification of bullying

霸凌的认定

  1. Persistence: This situation is persistent, starting from November 2022 and continuing until March 2023 when we communicated with the school, and the school has yet to take any action.
  2. Behavior escalation: The situation has been escalating, from verbal bullying to isolation, and finally resulting in physical harm.
  3. Targeted: These behaviors are all targeted at my child, and were carried out by a team consisting of two girls who engaged in bullying behaviors.
  4. Harm caused to the child: During this incident, my child’s personality underwent significant changes. She used to be a cheerful and lively child, but now she has become less confident and sometimes afraid to be alone.
  1. 持续性:这种情况是持续性的,从2022年11月开始一直到我们与学校沟通时的2023年3月,而且学校至今还未采取任何措施。
  2. 行为升级:事态一直在升级,最初是语言霸凌,然后演变成孤立行为,最后导致了身体伤害。
  3. 针对性:这些行为都是针对我的孩子的,是由两名女生组成的团队进行的欺凌行为。
  4. 对孩子造成的伤害:在此事件的过程中,我的孩子的性格发生了显著的变化。她曾经是一个开朗活泼的孩子,但现在变得不那么自信,有时害怕一个人独处。

Progress of the event:

事件进程:


The beginning of the event. / 事件的开始

Starting from the week my child was quarantined at home from the end of November 2023 due to being infected with COVID-19 by a male classmate, two other female students began merging their beds together and their relationship became even closer.

在2023年11月的月末,我的孩子从班上的一名男同学那里感染了新冠肺炎。随后,学校通知我们将她接回家进行隔离。从她不在学校住宿的那一周开始,另外两名女生开始将床合并在一起,他们的关系变得更加紧密。


First time providing feedback to the school authority / 第一次向校方反馈

Jan 2023

Those two girls repeatedly took out a flashlight and shone it in my child’s eyes at night after the lights were turned off, and they laughed and teased her when she woke up. I reported this to the school and dormitory management, but they replied that it was just harmless play between the children.

2023年1月

那两名女生曾经在某段时间里,多次在晚上关灯睡觉后,拿出手电筒照着我的孩子的眼睛。当我的孩子惊醒后,她们就开始嘲笑和取笑她。我曾向校方和宿舍管理员反映此事实,但校方回复称这只是孩子们之间的玩闹。

School opinion / 校方意见:

The school administration feedback stated that it was just normal play among the children and I don’t need to worry too much. They also mentioned that my child sometimes hits others’ bodies or pokes their backs with fingers, which are similar behaviors.

校方反馈称这只是孩子们之间的正常玩闹,我不必过于担心。他们还提到,我的孩子有时也会动手拍打别人的身体,或者用手指戳别人的背部等类似的行为。

Our opinion / 我方意见

However, the school authorities did not take any action on this matter and appeared to be trying to pick holes in our complaints when responding.

然而,校方未能对这种情况采取任何行动,并且似乎在回应我们的投诉时试图找茬。


I am requesting a room change for my child for the first time to separate them from two other girls in the dormitory. / 第一次要求更换寝室,与另两个女孩分开住宿。

After our first negotiation, we requested to change my child’s dormitory and be separated from the other two girls. The dormitory manager said there was only one vacant room available for the moment, located downstairs with no windows. It’s a relatively dark, damp, and lower-level room. The dorm supervisor took my child to see the room once, and my child was scared to go inside and just stood at the door. This is what we saw during our site visit. My child thought she had done something wrong and was being punished to live in that room. She was very disappointed. After discussing with my child, she ultimately decided to live with the other two girls for a while longer. At the same time, we requested that the dormitory manager strengthen their management.

第一次交涉后,我们要求更换我孩子的宿舍,与另外两个女孩分开住宿。宿舍管理人员表示暂时只有一间空宿舍可供更换,但是该宿舍位于楼下,没有窗户,因为是一间比较阴暗且潮湿,楼层较低的房间。宿舍主管曾单独带我的孩子参观了一次这个房间,我的孩子站在门口看着就不敢进去。这也是在我们实地查看是看到的情景。我的孩子以为自己做错了什么要被惩罚住在这个房间,她很失落。经过和孩子商量讨论,我的孩子最终决定再和另外两个女孩住在一起一段时间,同时我们也要求宿舍管理人员加强管理。

School opinion / 校方意见:

There is an option to change the dorm, but currently, there are no available rooms for primary school students. Because younger children cannot share a room with older female students, the only available room is located downstairs, which has no windows or sunlight and is on a lower floor.

可以更换宿舍,但是目前没有多余的小学生宿舍房间。由于低龄孩子不能与高年级女生住在同一个房间,所以只能入住楼下那一间没有窗户、没有阳光且楼层较低的房间。

Our opinion / 我方意见:

There is no room for choice

没的选择


The escalation of bullying behavior. / 霸凌行为的升级

Feb 2023

My daughter told me that her two female classmates are no longer friendly with her. These girls moved my daughter’s toiletries and placed them in one of the sinks behind the bathroom door. There are four sinks in the bathroom, but my daughter is not allowed to use the other three. Whenever my daughter is washing up, they often forcefully push the door open and bump into her back. My daughter has to hurry up and finish washing up each time, and also needs to use her foot to block the door while doing so to avoid being bumped and injured.

When my daughter is showering, they would barge in and look at her naked body directly, and then make fun of her developing body. When my daughter asks them to leave, they would say that this is a public area and my daughter has no right to ask them to leave. After being violated and mocked multiple times, my daughter has become very insecure.

2023年2月

我的女儿告诉我,她的两个女同学不再与她友好相处。这些女孩搬走了我的女儿的洗漱用品,将它们放在洗手间门后面的一个洗脸池里。他们洗手间共有四个洗脸池,但不允许我的女儿使用其他三个。每当我的女儿在洗漱时,她们经常会用力推门进来并撞她的后背。我的女儿每次洗漱时只能加快完成,而且需要在洗漱时用脚挡住门,以免被撞伤。

当我的女儿洗澡时,她们会直接冲进来看她的裸体,并嘲笑她正在发育的身体。当我的女儿要求她们离开时,她们会说这是公共区域,我女儿没有权利要求他们离开。在多次被侵犯和嘲笑后,我的女儿变得不自信。


Upgrade of Bullying Behavior / 霸凌行为的再次升级

In early March, my daughter started feeling uncomfortable about living in the school dormitory. On March 13th, she clearly stated that she did not want to live on campus, but the school claimed that she would be expelled if she did not. However, we still decided to pick her up and communicated with her. Eventually, she agreed to continue living on campus. However, I later found out that this was a wrong decision.

On March 14th, during class break, my daughter was pushed to the ground by another girl and hit the back of her chair, causing two wounds that were about 5 square centimeters each. However, despite such serious physical harm, the school did not inform us of the incident and did not punish the perpetrator, nor even talked to her.

On the following night, March 15th, my daughter and two other girls were preparing to sleep in the dormitory when the two girls invited her to join a passing ball game with a ball-shaped plush toy. My daughter thought they were expressing goodwill, so she joined the game. However, during the game, the two girls used all their strength four times to hit the ball on my daughter’s face, causing her to cry in pain and the two girls to mock her loudly.

在3月初,我的女儿开始对学校住宿生活产生抵触情绪,3月13日,她明确表示不想住宿,但学校声称,如果不住校将被退学。这天晚上我们仍然决定接她回家,和女儿进行沟通并最终同意继续住宿。但后来我发现这是一个错误的决定。

3月14日,也就是不想住宿的第二天,我的女儿在课堂休息时间被另一名女孩推倒在地,背部撞在椅子上造成两个共约5平方厘米的伤口。然而,如此严重的人身伤害,学校并没有通知我们,也没有对施害者进行任何处罚,甚至找施暴者谈话都没有。

次日晚上,也就是3月15日,我的女儿和另外两个女孩在寝室准备睡觉时,两个女孩邀请她加入一个传球的游戏,扔一个球状毛绒玩具,我的女儿以为是另外两个女孩向她示好,所以加入了这个游戏。在游戏中,有人用尽全力四次将球砸在我的孩子脸上,导致她悲痛大哭,另外两个女孩却大声笑她。


This is the first formal negotiation with the school / 第一次正式与学校交涉

20 March 2023

I had a formal meeting with the principal and negotiated with him. I demanded that the school treat every student fairly, intervene and address bullying behavior, and prevent the further escalation of the situation.

2023年3月20日,正式约见了校长,进行了交涉。我要求学校公平对待每个学生,对霸凌行为进行介入处理,制止事件的进一步升级。

School opinion / 校方意见:

The school said it will investigate the matter, but does not believe it is a bullying behavior.

学校表示会对此事进行调查,但是认为这不是霸凌行为。

Our opinion / 我方意见

Our standpoint remains that this is a case of bullying, as the child was subjected to verbal and physical harm that was targeted and prolonged. We hope that the school will conduct a thorough investigation and take necessary measures to ensure the safety and rights of the children. We also hope to maintain communication and be updated on the progress of the school’s investigation in a timely manner.

我们仍然坚持认为这就是一起霸凌事件,因为孩子遭受到了言语和身体上的伤害,并且这种行为是有针对性的,长时间持续。我们希望学校能够对此进行认真的调查,并采取必要的措施来确保孩子们的安全和权益。我们也希望能够保持沟通,并及时了解学校调查的进展情况。


The follow-up to the first formal negotiations. / 第一次正式交涉后续

22 March 2023

After investigation, the school found that there were indeed two girls who had isolated my daughter for a period of time. Through the investigation, the school learned that my daughter was positive and normal during class, but always alone during break time and after class, which was in sharp contrast to her behavior during class. The other two girls often kept each other’s company and avoided my daughter. Although my daughter got along well with other students in higher grades, she was indeed isolated by these two girls. However, the school believes that being bullied and injured during recess is different from being isolated, which should be considered as an inappropriate behavior rather than bullying. The school will pay attention to this matter and provide appropriate guidance when necessary.

In addition, the school informed me that the three of them sat together and had lunch today while chatting, so the school believes that there is no longer a problem.

2023年3月22日

经过调查,学校发现确实有两名女生对我的女儿进行了一段时间的孤立行为。通过调查,学校了解到我的女儿在上课期间表现积极,一切正常,但下课后、休息时间和课余时间总是独自一人,与上课时的表现形成鲜明对比。而另外两名女生则常常在一起,疏远我的女儿。虽然我的女儿与其他高年级的学生相处融洽,但她确实受到了这两名女孩的孤立。然而,学校认为课间被施暴受伤与被孤立是两件事情,孤立行为不属于霸凌,而应该被视为一种不当的行为。学校会关注此事,并在必要时给予适当的引导。

另外,学校告诉我,今天他们三个孩子坐在一起吃午饭,边吃边聊天,所以学校认为已经没有问题了

School opinion / 校方意见:

The school can arrange the room exchange, and you can move into the other room across from your original one during the last week of this semester.

Despite the severity of the situation, the school authorities remained silent and took no action.

更换寝室的事情,学校可以安排,在原来寝室对面的另一间,这个学期最后一周就可以搬进去。

校方在这么严重的事情发生后,仍然保持沉默,不做任何行动。

Our opinion / 我方意见

The bullying incident was downplayed, despite the severity of the physical harm inflicted. They thought the bullying had ended because the three of them sat together for lunch. I am unsure whether it is due to the school’s ineffective management or their indifference to the point of allowing the bullying behavior to reach irreparable harm to the child. All bullying behavior stems from a lack of attention from both the family and the school. We have had multiple discussions and negotiations, yet the school still fails to take any action against bullying, which I find incomprehensible.

把霸凌的事件轻描淡写,如此严重的人身伤害过后,因为她们三人坐在一起吃午饭,认为霸凌就结束了,我不清楚是学校方面管理无能,还是袖手旁观想让霸凌行为对孩子的伤害达到无法挽回的地步。所有的霸凌起源于家庭和学校的不重视,我们已经通过多次沟通交涉,学校仍然不对霸凌做任何行动,这是让我无法理解的。


The important turning point of this complaint. / 这次投诉事件的重要转折点

On March 24th, Friday afternoon after school, my wife contacted the dormitory manager to enter the student dormitory to help our child move to another room. The school did not inform my wife that she needed to be accompanied by the dormitory manager before entering the student dormitory. Although my wife contacted the dormitory manager, she waited for 20 minutes but no one came. At that time, it was also during a time when students were not allowed to enter the dormitory. After confirming that it was safe, my wife and child entered the dormitory and moved items to another room. At this time, one of the two female students who lived in the same room as my child also entered and left the room in a hurry. Later, she complained to the school that my wife had made a “threat” towards her, which she thought was my wife saying, “Why don’t you say hello to me? Are you afraid of me?”

During the period of November 2022 to February 2023, at the request of the father of this G5 female student who complained about my wife, she resided with us on weekends. We provided assistance and offered her free accommodation for three months.

When moving dormitory items, my wife made a disturbing discovery: there were a large number of ants on my daughter’s bed. Although my daughter often mentioned that there were ants in the school dormitory, my wife realized that the situation was far from simple. On and around my daughter’s bed, there were scattered crumbs of powdered biscuits. The biscuits felt crispy when squeezed, indicating that they were recently scattered and had not been dampened. Moreover, my daughter has never brought any biscuits to school and does not have the habit of eating in bed. My wife suspects that someone regularly sprinkles food on my daughter’s bed to attract ants and bugs.

Two hours after the incident (24 Mar 2023 17:37), the school principal and Admissions Director contacted me through video call and verbally informed me that someone had complained about my wife’s behavior, and that my child would need to stop attending classes immediately. It was not until the school officially notified us that my child and family were not allowed to enter the school campus.

This was a turning point of the incident. The person who was bullied was once again bullied by the school’s decision to suspend them, while the bully could lie freely without investigation by the school. Suspending a student from attending classes is one of the most severe punishments a school can give, but the school only informed us verbally through video call and did not provide any written documentation.

在3月24日,星期五下午放学后,我妻子与宿舍管理负责人联系,将进入学生宿舍帮助孩子搬寝室。学校在事先没人告知我妻子进入学生宿舍必须有宿舍管理员陪同,然而联系过宿舍负责人后,我妻子等待20分钟仍然没有人前来,而当时正处于学生禁止进入宿舍的时间段内。确认安全后,我妻子与孩子进入了宿舍搬寝室物品到另一个房间。而在这时,与我孩子同一房间的两名女生中的一名,在不允许进入的时段进入寝室,然后匆忙离开,并向学校投诉我妻子有“威胁”行为,她认为的“威胁”是我妻子对她说“你怎么不和我打招呼,你这么怕我吗”。

从2022年11月至2023年2月这段时间内,因为这名G5女学生父亲的请求,这名投诉我妻子的G5女学生在周末居住在我们家。我们提供了帮助,免费托管了她三个月。

在搬寝室物品时,我妻子发现了一个让人细思极恐的细节:我女儿的床铺上有非常多的蚂蚁。虽然我女儿经常说起学校宿舍有蚂蚁的事情,但我妻子发现了事情远没那么简单,在我女儿的床铺上和床铺边,撒满了粉末状的饼干屑,床上的饼干屑手捏上去是脆的质感,说明这些是最近撒上去的,还没有受潮。且我的女儿从未带任何饼干到学校,也无床上吃零售的习惯。我妻子怀疑有人定期在我女儿的床铺上撒上食物吸引蚂蚁和虫子。

事件发生过后2小时(2023年3月24日 17:37),我们已回到家中,校长和招生主任通过视频电话与我联系,口头告知有人投诉我妻子的行为,并且口头通知我,我的孩子立即停课,在未收到学校通知前,我孩子和家人不得进入校园。

这是事件的转折点,受霸凌的人再次受到学校霸凌被停课,而施以霸凌的人可以随意撒谎,学校不需要调查。

让学生停课是一个学校对学生最大的惩罚之一,学校竟然以视频通话的形式告知,而不出具任何书面文件。

School opinion / 校方意见:

Verbal notification to immediately suspend attending classes.

口头通知,立即停课

Our opinion / 我方意见

I understand very clearly that the school hopes to deter us from reporting bullying incidents by intentionally filing this complaint, and hopes to use this method to make us stop reporting bullying incidents in the school. This is an important turning point that will escalate the situation. However, the most outrageous part of this incident is that the school has given the harshest punishment to a child who has already experienced 5 months of bullying through verbal notification, rather than punishing the child who committed the bullying. So far, the children involved in the bullying have not received any punishment, not even a conversation.

The school’s management ability has exceeded my expectations, as they resorted to such a low-level approach in handling the complaint.

我非常清楚学校希望通过这件故意投诉的事件,来威慑我们的投诉,希望用这种方式让我们停止投诉学校霸凌事件。这是一个重要转折点,将事态升级。但是这一事件最过分的地方在于学校通过口头通知,给一个本来就已经经历了5个月霸凌的孩子,用了最严厉的惩罚,而不是对施暴的孩子惩罚。至目前为止,参与霸凌的孩子仍然未接受任何调查,哪怕谈话都没有。

学校方面管理能力让我出乎意料,用如此低级的手段来处理投诉事件。


My appeal email after the school unilaterally stopped my child from attending classes/ 学校单方面对我孩子停课后我的申诉邮件

25 Mar 2023 12:27

Dear Mr. L***,

I am writing to request an official document confirming that ***** has been suspended from school. I strongly believe that it was highly inappropriate to inform her of this decision through a video call, as it deprived her of her right to attend school.

I have spoken with both **** and ***** separately, as they were both involved in the incident. ****’s statement, in my opinion, did not constitute a threat. Therefore, I am concerned that you have made a decision to suspend ***** based on incomplete or unverified information.

I would appreciate it if you could investigate this matter urgently and provide me with a satisfactory outcome. Upon reviewing the School Policies, I could not find any provisions that allow for indefinite school suspension without verification of the facts. Furthermore, the student who was suspended is currently experiencing bullying, which has caused her additional distress. I strongly believe that the parents of the other student involved and the school may have contributed to this incident. Thus, I am concerned that you may have acted beyond your powers.

I reserve the right to report this matter to the Education Department and seek legal remedies if necessary.

Please respond to this email as soon as possible, and I look forward to your prompt action on this matter.

Sincerely,
***
*****’s father

2023年3月25日 12:27

亲爱的L***先生

我写信是要求提供一份正式文件,以证实**已被停课。我认为,通过视频电话通知这个决定是非常不恰当的,这涉及剥夺她上学的权利。

我已经分别与**(孩子)和**(孩子母亲)谈过,因为她们都是这一事件的在场人员。在我看来,**(孩子母亲)说的话并不构成威胁。因此,我觉得你们可能是信息不完整或对未经核实的信息做出对**停课的决定。

如果您能尽快调查此事并给我一个满意的结果,我将不胜感激。经查阅学校政策,我找不到任何允许在未核实事实的情况下无限期停课的规定。此外,被停课的学生目前正经历着被霸凌,这给她带来了更大的伤害。我觉得,另一名涉及此事学生的家长和学校可能促成了这一事件。所以,我觉得你的所做行为可能已经超出了你的权力范围。

我保留向教育部门投诉此事的权利,并在必要时寻求法律补救措施。

请尽快回复本邮件,我期待你对此事迅速采取行动。

真诚的、
**
**的父亲


The response from the school principal after receiving my email/学校校长在收到我邮件后的回复

25 Mar 2023 14:54

Hello Mr. ***,

Thanks for your email. Since you’ve threatened legal action, I will now leave you with our Head of School, S***** G*****, now copied to this email. 

Yours,

L***

2023年3月25日 14:54

*先生,你好、

谢谢你的电子邮件。由于你威胁要采取法律行动,我现在将把你转交给我们的大校长S***** G*****,现在已抄送这封邮件。

你的、

路**

School opinion / 校方意见:

Beyond my capacity, throwing the problem to the superintendent

超出能力范围,将麻烦扔给大校长

Our opinion / 我方意见

The principal doesn’t even understand what legal power and threat mean, and always shifts responsibility when faced with problems.

这位校长完全搞不清什么是合法权力,什么是威胁。遇事先甩锅。


First Meeting with the Head of School after Transfer/转移大校长处理后第一次约谈

On March 27th at 5pm, I had a meeting in the school office with the Head of School as per our scheduled appointment. In the email prior to the meeting, I requested that the school provide my daughter’s medical records, bullying incident reports, and formal documents regarding her suspension and reinstatement. I also requested that the school’s principal attend the meeting, but the principal declined citing the need to tend to family responsibilities and left early. Those present at the meeting were the Head of School, Residential Director, Personal Assistant to Board of Director, and admissions director.

During previous communications with the school, the admissions director, who assisted as a Mandarin-English interpreter, did not offer translation assistance. Additionally, he left early due to hypoglycemia symptoms during the meeting.

On the day of the meeting, the school only provided my daughter’s medical records following her injury from being pushed, and records of two conversations with the principal regarding the bullying incident. However, the school refused to provide formal documents regarding my daughter’s suspension and reinstatement.

During the meeting, the school suggested that it was wrong for my wife to enter the dormitory without accompaniment. However, we provided evidence proving that my wife had contacted the dormitory supervisor beforehand and waited for 20 minutes without a response. The school verbally acknowledged that this was a mistake in management but did not explain why the Grade 5 female student who bullied my child was allowed to enter the dormitory during off-hours without permission.

The school did not provide a clear response regarding the bullying incident nor did they express an opinion on whether an investigation was necessary. Furthermore, the school’s Board of Director suggested that our continuous complaints were bullying towards the school.

As a result of the meeting, it was determined that my daughter would not stay in the dormitory during the next semester, but whether she will stay there in the future is to be confirmed by my daughter.

In summary, during the meeting, the school and I discussed the following: 1) my wife’s entry into the dormitory to help move my daughter’s room was due to a management mistake on the school’s part after prior communication with the dormitory supervisor, 2) the school promised to contact parents in a timely manner if a child is injured, and 3) my child may not live on campus.

3月27日下午5点,与学校大校长约见在学校办公室会面,在约谈邮件中,我要求学校出具我女儿的治疗记录,投诉霸凌记录,以及校方单方面对我女儿做出停课和恢复上学的正式文件。我在约见邮件中要求校长也参与会议。校长以需要照顾家庭为由不参加会议,提早下班了。当天参与会面的人有大校长,学生宿舍主管,董事秘书,以及招生主任。
原本家长与校方沟通时,协助口语翻译的招生主任不协助翻译。他在会谈过程中出现低血糖症状提早离开。
当天学校方面仅提供了我女儿被推倒受伤后的治疗记录,投诉霸凌事件过程中我们与校长的两次谈话记录。但是学校方面始终不出具对我女儿进行停课以及恢复上学的正式文件。
在会谈中学校方面提出我妻子在无人陪同的情况下进入宿舍是错误的行为,而我们也提供了完整的证据,证明了我妻子在联系宿舍主管后,一直等了20分钟都没有等到陪同人员前来,学校方面口头承认了此事是管理上的失误。但未提及为何那名霸凌我孩子的G5女学生可以在未经允许进入宿舍的时段进入宿舍。
学校方面在对霸凌投诉事件时没有给予明确回应,校方董事秘书甚至认为我们持续投诉行为是对学校的霸凌。校方没有对我女儿经历霸凌事件是否需要调查表达意见。
会面最后确定我女儿下个学期不再住宿,但是最终是否住宿需要由我女儿确认。
谈话整个过程我们与校方讨论的结果总结为以下几点:1、我妻子进入宿舍帮女儿搬寝室房间前已与宿舍管理沟通,对于她无人陪同下进入宿舍是校方在管理上的失误;2、校方承诺以后孩子受伤,将会及时与家长取得联系告知情况;3、我的孩子可以不住校。

School opinion / 校方意见:

Unknown

未知

Our opinion / 我方意见

I had expected that the face-to-face meeting would yield progress, but in reality, there was no substantial progress. During the meeting, the school authorities consistently avoided acknowledging the fact that the school principal had imposed a suspension on my child during a video call. I will wait for the school authorities to provide a final report on this matter.

本来我以为面对面会谈将有进展,但实际无实质进展,校方在会谈中始终回避校长和招生主任在视频通话中对我孩子进行停课处罚的事实。我会等待校方对此事出一份最终报告。


The investigative report provided by the school has once again elevated this incident to a new level/校方出具的调查报告,再次将这一事件推到一个新的高度

The full investigation report is as follows:

调查报告全文如下:

School opinion / 校方意见:

Did my wife’s question, ‘Are you afraid of me?’ constitute a threat to the G5 female student who bullied our child?
The school ensured the student’s safety by escorting her to the airport, and it was confirmed that my wife and family were not on the same flight.
The authenticity of the entire incident cannot be verified. The school follows Thai law in protecting children
will not impose any disciplinary action on our daughter.

我妻子的一句“你这么怕我吗”对霸凌我孩子的那名G5女学生构成了人身威胁?
校方为保护孩子,护送这名G5女学生到达机场,期间确认我妻子和家人没有和她在同一个航班
无法证实整个过程的真实性
学校根据泰国法律实施保护儿童
不会对我女儿进行纪律处分

Our opinion / 我方意见

The “Child Safeguarding Considerations” that were never mentioned in the previous day’s meeting suddenly appeared, and an accusation was added to the investigation report, stating that “the school escorted the G5 female student for child protection.” Without any evidence to prove that my wife posed a threat to the female student, the school exaggerated a routine airport pickup service and depicted my wife as a terrorist in the investigation report. However, the so-called investigation report did not conduct any investigation because the report only reflected the school’s unilateral opinion on the matter. The report did not interview the parties involved, the bystanders, or conduct a detailed investigation into the complainant’s claims. This is an extremely unprofessional document, and it raises serious doubts about the school’s professionalism.

Oh, should I be grateful that the school didn’t discipline my daughter?

在前一天面谈中从未提及的“儿童保护措施”出现了,在调查中强行加了一条描述我妻子的罪状“学校为保护儿童,采取护送那位G5女学生到达机场”,在没有任何证据证明能证明我妻子对那位女学生有威胁的情况下,学校在这件事情上大做文章,一个已经预约计划好的非常平常的接送机服务,在调查报告中将我妻子描写成了一个恐怖分子。但是所谓的调查报告没有进行任何调查,因为调查里所说的双方意见不一致,实际是学校单方面的意见,在这份调查报告中,没有对当事人进行问询,没有对旁观者进行问询,也没有再对投诉者进行细节调查,这是一份非常不专业的文档。我严重怀疑学校的专业度。

是不是我还要感恩学校没对我的女儿进行纪律处分?


We have questions regarding the investigative report submitted by the school administration./对校方出具的调查报告提出质疑

30 Mar 2023 14:11

Dear Ms. S*****,

I would like to express my sincere gratitude to you and your management team for taking your valuable time to communicate with us face-to-face outside of working hours on Monday.

Initially, I believed that after our face-to-face communication, both parties were hoping that the situation would develop in a positive direction. However, when I saw the investigation file, I was shocked to find that not only did the issue not progress, but it seemed to be moving in the opposite direction.

There are several serious errors in this investigation file that I will point out one by one. If you wish to disprove the errors I have pointed out, you will need to provide relevant document evidence.

1. The G.5 female student’s return to Shanghai was not due to protection measures taken by the school. As far as I know, the student’s parents had already booked flights and planned to return to Shanghai on that day.

On the Thursday evening before the incident occurred, **** confirmed that the student spent a long time packing her bags in the dorm and discussed their plans to return to Shanghai on Saturday with her roommate.

*** also saw the already packed suitcases while she and **** went to the dormitory.

Yesterday at the EA Class, Mr. L*** clearly stated that the G.5 female student had planned and arranged to return to Shanghai.

Given that someone is lying in this investigation and has elevated the false allegations against *** to a new level, causing tremendous damage to her reputation, I request that the school provide the following materials to prove the authenticity of the protection measures and stop the harm to ***’s reputation.

(a) Records of the G.5 female student’s parent’s application to accompany her to the airport (including but not limited to emails, phone calls, social app, etc.). Personal information such as names may be deleted for privacy reasons, but the record of the application time must be kept. (b) All records of the school’s accompanying airport arrangements, including corresponding times. (c) Time records for emergency purchases of air tickets to protect the safety of students after the incident.

2. *** clearly explained why she entered the dormitory with the child during our conversation. Before entering the dormitory, *** communicated with Mr. C*** via phone call (at 15:19). Mr. C*** thought it was a good idea. Mr. C*** confirmed the truth of this matter during our face-to-face conversation on Monday. The school never informed *** that she had to be escorted by a dormitory supervisor to enter the dormitory. *** waited for almost 20 minutes until around 15:35-15:40, during the time when living students cannot enter the dormitory.

Therefore, after confirming her safety, *** entered the student dormitory, organized ***’s items, and sent pictures of the bedsheets to the dormitory supervisor at 15:54. She then left the dormitory.

*** met the dormitory supervisor outside the building. By this time, almost 40 minutes had passed since *** first made her request to enter the student dormitory. *** already expressed these situations clearly during the meeting with the school.

The school admitted the management mistakes, but these meeting contents were not recorded in the investigation file. We have made records on this matter.

3. The report claims that “the mom approached face to face and asked,” which is entirely inaccurate. In fact, *** was helping *** organize her belongings in front of the bookshelf when G.5 student entered the dormitory during the off-hours. Therefore, there was no possible “face to face” dialogue. The school should require any allegations to be verified through face-to-face conversations with witnesses and their guardians. 

4. The report states that the school has taken measures to protect the safety of children. However, in the past five months, *** has not received any protection when she was hurt. After this incident, *** was immediately suspended indefinitely, and her family was prohibited from entering the school. In our conversation, the school mentioned that this was in accordance with Thai child protection laws. I have checked the relevant laws and confirmed that Article 42 of “The Child Protection Act (No. 2) B.E. 2546 (2003)” stipulates that when a child is threatened or abused, authorized official agencies can apply to the court to protect the safety and rights of the child, including taking necessary protective measures against the child and their family. These measures may include warnings, protective orders, home visits, guardianship, and prohibition of abusers from approaching the child. It should be noted that the precondition for all these protective measures is that an application must be submitted to the court, and all protective measures must be executed by the court, not simply communicated orally by the school and erroneously implemented. As I had requested the school to provide the relevant documents via email before the meeting, but did not receive them on the day of the meeting, I would request that the school provide a written notice of ***’s suspension.

5. the information provided in the “Resolution” document regarding ***’s absence from 27th to 28th March is incorrect. Based on the school’s verbal communication, *** has actually been indefinitely barred from entering the APIS campus until notified by the school when she can return. In light of this inaccurate investigation, and *** not receiving notification to resume studies, she remains precluded from her right to attend school. Since this was a unilateral decision made by the school, it is requested that all school fees, accommodation fees, meal fees, and any other related expenses during ***’s suspension period be settled and refunded in cash before issuing a written reinstatement notice to ***.

Effective immediately, I will not accept any verbal communication as it appears to be highly casual and unprofessional. I am awaiting the school to supply me with an official written announcement both of ***’s suspended status and her reinstatement.

Based on the five serious errors cited above, please confirm and take corrective action with your management team.

As Proverbs 19:5 says, “He who gives false testimony will not go unpunished, and he who pours out lies will not go free.” Currently, without third-party oversight, there may be some false testimonies. If anyone provides false statements, our interests will not be guaranteed. Therefore, we request that the school handle this matter in an open and transparent manner, allowing for more students and parents to monitor the proceedings.

We need to address these issues before proceeding further. If things continue to go wrong, we will take steps to protect our interests. We will await further investigation by the school on this matter. The school’s actions towards both *** and *** have become more harmful each time, and we hope the school will apologize to *** and *** for these wrongful acts. We look forward to hearing good news.

Finally, it was unclear whether *** would continue residing on campus, and I need to consult with her. However, when *** and *** returned to their dormitory to pack their belongings, they found ***’s photo had already been removed, which has left *** feeling very disappointed.

We look forward to hearing back from you soon.

Sincerely,

***

2023年3月30日 14:11

亲爱的S*****女士,

对您和您的管理团队抽出宝贵时间在周一工作时间之外与我们面对面交流,表示衷心的感谢。

起初,我认为经过我们面对面的沟通,双方都希望事态向积极的方向发展。 然而,当我看到调查报告时,我惊奇地发现,这个问题不仅没有进展,而且似乎在向相反的方向发展。

这份调查文件中有几处严重错误,我将一一指出。 如果你对我指出的错误有疑问,也请你提供相关的证据。

1、G.5女学生返沪并非学校采取保护措施。 据了解,学生家长已经订好机票,准备当天返回上海。

事发前的周四晚上,*** 证实该学生在宿舍收拾行李很长时间,并与室友讨论周六返回上海的计划。

***和***去宿舍的时候,也看到了已经收拾好的行李箱。

昨天在EA课上,校长L***明确表示,G.5女同学提前做好了回上海的计划和安排。

鉴于有人在此次调查中撒谎,将对***的不实指控提升到一个新的高度,对她的名誉造成巨大损害,请学校提供以下材料,以证明这件事是儿童保护措施,停止侵害***的名誉。

(a) G.5女学生家长申请学校陪同前往机场的记录(包括但不限于邮件、电话、社交APP等)。 出于隐私原因,姓名等个人信息可能会被删除,但必须保留申请时间的记录。 (b) 学校随行机场安排的所有记录,包括相应的原始时间。 (c) 事件发生后紧急为该名学生购买机票的时间记录。

2、***在我们的谈话中清楚地解释了她为什么带着孩子进宿舍。 进入宿舍前,***通过电话与Mr. C****进行了交流(15:19)。 C****先生认为这是个好主意。 C****先生周一在我们的面对面交谈中证实了此事的真实性。 学校从来没有通知***,她必须由宿舍管理员陪同才能进入宿舍。 ***等了将近20分钟,一直等到15:35-15:40左右,这段时间是学生不能进宿舍的时间段。

于是,确认安全后,***进入学生宿舍,整理好***的物品,并于15时54分将床单照片发给宿舍管理员。 然后她离开了宿舍。

***在大楼外遇到了宿舍管理员。 此时,距离***第一次提出进入学生宿舍的要求,已经过去了将近四十分钟。 ***在与学校的会谈中已经将这些情况表达清楚了。

校方承认管理失误,但这些会议内容并未记录在调查档案中。 我们已经对此事进行了记录。

3、报道称“孩子母亲面对面走近询问”,完全不准确。 事实上,当G.5学生在不允许的时间进入宿舍时,***正在书架前帮助***整理自己的物品。 因此,不可能进行“面对面”对话。 学校应要求通过与证人及其监护人面对面交谈来核实这些投诉。

4、报告称学校已采取措施保护孩子们的安全。 然而,在过去的五个月里,***在受伤时并没有得到任何保护。 这件事发生后,***立即被无限期停学,她的家人也被禁止进入学校。 在我们的谈话中,学校提到这符合泰国儿童保护法。 我查阅了相关法律,确认《儿童保护法(第2号)B.E. 2546(2003)》第42条规定,当儿童受到威胁或虐待时,授权的官方机构可以向法院申请保护安全 和儿童的权利,包括对儿童及其家人采取必要的保护措施。 这些措施可能包括警告、保护令、家访、监护和禁止施虐者接近儿童。 需要注意的是,所有这些保护措施的实施前提是必须向法院提出申请,所有保护措施都必须由法院执行,而不是学校口头传达、错误执行。 由于我在会前曾通过电子邮件要求学校提供相关文件,但在会议当天没有收到,我要求学校提供一份***停学的书面通知。

5、最后总结部分中关于***3月27日至28日上课缺席的信息不正确。 根据学校的口头通知,***实际上已被无限期禁止进入 APIS 校园,直到学校通知她何时可以返回。 鉴于这种不准确的调查,并且***没有收到恢复学习的通知,她仍然无法上学。 由于这是学校的单方面决定,要求在向***发出书面复学通知前,将***停学期间的所有学费、住宿费、餐费及任何其他相关费用结清并以现金退还。

即日起,我不会接受任何面谈,因为它看起来非常随意和不专业。 我正在等待学校向我提供关于***停课和复课的正式书面通知。

基于上述五个严重错误,请与您的管理团队确认并采取纠正措施。

正如箴言 19 章 5 节所说:“作假见证的,必不免受罚;吐出谎言的,必不逍遥法外。” 目前,在没有第三方监督的情况下,可能会出现一些虚假证词。 如有任何人提供虚假陈述,我们的利益将得不到保障。 因此,我们要求学校以公开透明的方式处理此事,让更多的学生和家长能够监督。

在继续进行之前,我们需要解决这些问题。 如果事情继续出错,我们将采取措施保护我们的利益。 我们将等待学校对此事的进一步调查。 学校对***和***的行为一次比一次伤害,我们希望学校能为这些错误行为向***和***道歉。 我们期待听到好消息。

最后,***是否会继续住在校园里,我还不清楚,我需要和她商量一下。 然而,当***和***回到宿舍收拾东西时,却发现***的照片已经被取走了,这让***非常失望。

我们期待尽快收到您的回音。

真挚地,

***

School opinion / 校方意见:

Further persecution of the complaining families, shifting all the blame onto the victimized students and their families, excessively glorifying the school’s achievements in the report, and fabricating numerous false accusations against the complainants’ families.

进一步迫害投诉家庭,将所有错误全部推给受害学生和家庭,在报告中把学校的功劳无限夸大,并对投诉者家庭制造大量诬陷。

Our opinion / 我方意见

The school has, so far, adopted the approach of creating a large amount of false accusations against families of bullying victims who file complaints, in order to force them to abandon their complaints. The actual content of the Child Protection Act repeatedly referred to by the school, is the paragraph I have outlined in my email, which stipulates that child protection measures must be enforced by the court. The school takes advantage of parents’ lack of understanding of Thai law to exert pressure on complainants from various angles. During the meeting, my wife, who had already reached a conclusion, entered the dormitory without the accompaniment of the dormitory administrator. The school has admitted that this was a management error during the meeting, but in the report, they completely omitted this and instead placed all the blame on us.

学校方面到目前为止,采取的做法是对霸凌受害者的家庭,制造大量的诬陷,逼迫受害者家庭放弃投诉。学校方面多次提到的儿童保护法,真正的内容是我邮件中列出的那一段,保护儿童措施是必须由法院执行的,学校利用家长可能对泰国法律不了解这一信息差,从多面向让投诉人施压。在面谈中已经有了结论的宿舍必须有管理人员陪同才能进入这一问题,学校方面在面谈时已经承认这是管理的失误,但是在报告中完全没有提及,反而把错误全推给了我们。


16 Apr 2023 14:52

Dear Ms. **** and Mr. ***,

I hope this email finds you well as we conclude our April Holiday.

When we left the family meeting on Monday, 27 March, we all agreed on the following actions:

  1. All family communication will happen through email.
  2. All student visits to the nurse office will be reported to the parents
  3. S*** will make arrangements for ***** to speak with our school counselor when we return from the April holiday.
  4. ***** will become a day student for the remainder of the 4th quarter.
  5. ***** and her parents will attend the student led conferences on Wednesday, 28 March, 2023.
    a. Following the conference, ***** and her family will call Mr. C**** to make
    arrangements to move out of the dorms.
  6. ***** and her family will communicate with school which transportation option will be used when returning from the holiday.
    a. Personal transportation
    b. School bus – to and from the Primary Campus
    c. Door to Door van service

Also from our meeting, the following was shared:

  1. As a school, we will always side with a child when safeguarding is a concern as required by Thai Law.
  2. Parents are not allowed in the dorms unaccompanied (without Residential or Office Staff supervision).
  3. This was not a disciplinary action against ***** – This incident will not affect her academic or residential standing at APIS. Her absence on Monday, 27 March and 28 March will be excused and she will be given the opportunity to make up any/all missed work.

When we left the meeting after 7:00pm, everyone was in agreement with these points.

The document that was shared with you was a result of the investigation. I believe that you may have misinterpreted that information. All information were factual statements.

From the school’s perspective, we have taken the necessary action on each of the incidents involving ***** and the other students.

When you met with the Residential Director and the School Principal on Wednesday, 22 March – there is documentation that all parties agreed on the next steps forward.

It is unfortunate that our communication has not been clearly understood and that you remain unsatisfied with your experience at APIS.

***** is a valued student and we hope that she will be returning on Monday as a day student for the remainder of the 4th quarter.

With regards,
S***** G*****
Head of School

2023年4月16日 14:52

亲爱的*女士和*先生、

在我们结束四月份的假期时,我希望这封邮件能让你们感觉良好。

当我们在3月27日星期一的家庭会议上离开时,我们都同意采取以下行动:

所有的家庭沟通将通过电子邮件进行。

所有学生到护士办公室的情况都将向家长报告。

S***将安排在我们4月假期回来后与我们的学校辅导员交谈。

* 在第四季度的剩余时间里将成为走读生。

** 和她的父母将参加2023年3月28日(星期三)的学生主导会议。 a. 会议结束后,** 和她的家人将打电话给C先生****,以安排搬出宿舍。
安排搬出宿舍。

* 和她的家人将与学校沟通,假期归来时将使用哪种交通方式。
a. 个人交通
b. 校车–往返于小学校园
c. 门到门面包车服务

在我们的会议上,还分享了以下内容:

作为一所学校,根据泰国法律的规定,当孩子的安全问题引起关注时,我们将始终站在孩子一边。

家长不允许在无人陪伴的情况下进入宿舍(没有住宿或办公室工作人员监督)。

这不是对* 的纪律处分–这一事件不会影响她在APIS的学术或住宿地位。她在3月27日星期一和3月28日的缺席将被原谅,她将有机会补上任何/所有错过的工作。

当我们在晚上7点后离开会议时,每个人都对这些观点表示同意。

与你分享的文件是调查的结果。我相信,你可能误解了这些信息。所有的信息都是事实的陈述。

从学校的角度来看,我们已经对涉及* 和其他学生的每一起事件采取了必要的行动。

当你在3月22日星期三与住宿部主任和学校校长会面时–有文件表明各方都同意下一步的行动。

遗憾的是,我们的沟通没有被清楚地理解,你对在APIS的经历仍然不满意。

With regards,
S***** G*****
Head of School

School opinion / 校方意见:

The investigation report was reiterated to me, but there was no positive response to any of the questions I raised. The arrogant attitude conveyed that the investigation report was final, and there would be no further investigation into any details.

复读机,重复播放了调查报告的内容,对我所有提出的疑问没有任何正面回应,傲慢的态度表达了这份调查报告就是最终报告,不会再调查任何细节。

Our opinion / 我方意见

A report riddled with flaws, one can easily spot numerous issues upon even a brief reading. It’s hard not to doubt the professionalism of the so-called management team members who produced it.

一份漏洞百出的报告,你稍作阅读就能看出很多问题,不得不怀疑这群所谓管理团队人员的专业度。



The content is continuously being updated.
内容持续更新中

Welcome to participate in the discussion of this event.
The school and bullies are welcome to leave a comment to state their opinion if they believe that the information on this page is not accurate. This is an open and fair platform for discussion.

欢迎参与讨论本次事件
校方及霸凌者如果认为与本页面信息与事实不符,也欢迎留言陈述,这是一个公平公开的讨论平台

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